All At Once
by cerie.rose
Summary: Tony contemplates his life and his future with a certain beautiful ex-assasion.


All At Once

A/N: Read my other stories! Thanks! Also I will post the next chapter of "From Me To You" ASAP, it's just not completely done. So please enjoy this one-shot!

Setting: Post-Borderland.

Tony got into his car after work and pulled out of the parking lot, waving to Ziva and laughing silently as she zoomed past him and out of the parking lot. They had plans to meet for drinks at a bar they used to frequent, today was just one of those days where Tony needed a drink. Fortunately Ziva had recognized that and proposed they pay their favorite bar a visit.

Tony sighed as he pulled out of the parking lot; the last few weeks had been rough. He felt lost almost, like he would never find what he was looking for because if he was honest with himself, he didn't know what he was looking for.

He turned up the radio just as a song started playing:

**There are certain people you just keep coming back to**

**She is right in front of you**

**You begin to wonder could you find a better one**

**Compared to her now she's in question**

He listened carefully to the song lyrics, noting how perfectly they described the dilemma he was in. This was a rarity for Tony, music was just music, he never really interpreted lyrics, it just wasn't him.

**And all at once the crowd begins to sing**

**Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same**

He sighed as he thought of the past few weeks, the Dana debacle, feeling like he had lost his mojo while on random chat earlier that day, life just seemed to be crashing down around him lately.

**Maybe you want her maybe you need her**

**Maybe you started to compare to someone not there**

His phone beeped, he picked it up and saw that it was a text from Ziva saying she might be a couple minutes late because she wanted to stop at home and change into something more comfortable but not to worry, she would be there.

Tony smiled, he was glad he still could count on Ziva. He had not been treating her too nicely the past couple weeks, it was just easier to take his anger out on her, she was right there and he knew she wouldn't give up on him, even after all they had been through together, somehow he still knew that no matter what, she would always be there.

**Looking for the right one you line up the world to find**

**Where no questions cross your mind**

**But she won't keep on waiting for you without a doubt**

**Much longer for you to sort it out**

He thought about all the women he had dated, sure they all had been beautiful but beauty faded and although he hated to admit it, he did want something more than great sex. After every break up, after every one-night stand, it was always Ziva who he turned to. They never really talked about it, but it was comforting to know that no matter how many women came in and out of his life, she would still be there. But, would she always still be there?

**And all at once the crowd begins to sing**

**Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same**

Tony thought about it, there was no doubt that Ziva was beautiful, men repeatedly hit on her when they tried to conduct interviews, something that Tony had always hated. Plus she was intelligent and independent, she had fire. She wasn't just one of those women who would let a man trample all over her, life with Ziva would be fun, passionate, adventurous. But, what happened when she found that perfect man? What about their relationship? He remembered Rivkin. How that horrible year was etched in his memory, the feeling that she wasn't his, even though he'd never really had her in the first place, how it consumed him with anger and jealousy to the point where he had taken it out on her, made her feel like he didn't want her in his life at all.

**Maybe you want her maybe you need her**

**Maybe you started to compare to someone not there**

**Maybe you want it maybe you need it, **

**Maybe it's all you're running from, **

**Perfection will not come**

He thought about all the women he dated, somehow they were never right, they never seemed to fit his idea of what a woman should be. Even Jeanne, he had loved her but he realized now it had not been true love, his relationship with Jeanne was based on a lie, the feelings he had for her had been real but when he chose his job over her, he knew that it wasn't that real love where it hurt just to think about being apart from that person, where you couldn't sleep because being awake was just so much better.

**And all at once the crowd begins to sing**

**Sometimes**

**We'd never know what's wrong without the pain**

**Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same**

He remembered when Ziva had left last summer. How his heart felt like it had been ripped out of his chest and someone had filled the hole with cement. He lost all motivation to do anything; even NCIS was just a job. Then, they had thought she was dead. He couldn't accurately describe the pain he had felt when finding that out. The reasons he had pitched to Vance for wanting to find Saleem were bull, honestly Tony could have cared less that this man was a terrorist, it didn't matter how many people he had killed. Only one person mattered, Ziva. He had killed the one person in the world Tony couldn't live without.

**Maybe you want her maybe you need her**

**Maybe you've started to compare to someone not there**

**Maybe you want it maybe you need it**

**Maybe it's all you're running from**

**Perfection will not come**

When she had gotten back, things had been weird. But their confrontation in the bathroom was just enough encouragement for Tony. They started to feel like partners again. Maybe the problem wasn't that his perfect girl wasn't out there, maybe the problem was that every girl he met he compared to Ziva. She was the embodiment of everything he had ever wanted in a woman but he just cast her off to the side, refused to let himself feel and pushed her away again.

Maybe she was waiting for him, that at least he could hope. If there was even the tiniest chance they could be together, that they could make it work, he had to be the one to do it.

**Maybe you want her maybe you need her**

**Maybe you had her maybe you lost her to another**

**To another**

As Tony turned off his car and walked into the bar he decided he wasn't going to lose her, he couldn't because he didn't know how to keep on living if he did. It wasn't going to be easy, but he knew that if he wanted to have Ziva in his life, he had to let her know.

He made his way to a bar stool and sat down, he ordered two drinks, one for himself and one for Ziva in anticipation of her arrival.

A few minutes later right as the bartender had set the drinks down in front of Tony, he turned around to see Ziva walking toward him. She hadn't changed too much, just into jeans and a different pair of boots.

Tony smiled at her as she walked up, he handed her the drink.

Ziva smiled back at him, "Thank you." She said, taking a sip of the drink.

"Long Island iced tea, my favorite. You remembered." Ziva said, a hint of surprise in her voice.

"Of course I did." Tony said, smiling back at her.

"Is there something on my face?" Ziva asked.

"No, why would you think that?" Tony asked, a bit confused.

"Well you were just looking at me a little funny and I did not know why." Ziva said.

"Can I ask you something?" Tony ventured.

"Of course." Ziva said, still a bit confused.

"Would you like to have dinner with me?" Tony asked

"I did not realize you were hungry, you want to just order something here?" Ziva asked, looking around for the bartender.

Tony laughed, "No, Ziva, I meant do you want to have dinner with me now, but not here, someplace nice where we can talk and not get interrupted. And not talk about work stuff; I want to talk about you and me, like a date. Ziva David, I am asking you on a date."

Ziva stared at him for a minute before smiling. "Yes. I would like that."

Tony couldn't help but grin. He set money on the bar for the drinks and stood up, offering Ziva his hand, which she took timidly and they walked out of the bar, together.

Tony looked down at Ziva, who couldn't hide the smile on her face, which only made his smile widen. This, Tony thought to himself, was the start of something wonderful. He could just feel it.

**A/N: Review Please! ALSO, read my best friends NCIS blog! **

**www(dot)arosen1989(dot)blogspot(dot)com **

**do it! (& comments her also!)**


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